I Want To

I want you.

I want to know what you are thinking.

I want to make sure that all sides of your thoughts are taken care of and feel

satisfied,but I know I alone I can not do that, this scares me. I can never

crawl inside you and look around. It is not possible. I have found some

people can not even express what they are thinking, or do not want to.

It is easier if we just do our own thing and never really get deeper than

just the outside. This bothers me, but it is the only way to survive.

When I learn too much, then I learn there is nothing much more to learn.

Then it is just looking for distractions and the next thing to laugh about

or cry about. Thank god for making money, because what else would we

do with ourselves. What else do we have, but to love, spend money, be clean.

The lucky few got through. Every generation has a lucky few.

I wan to reach out to you. I want to hold your hand when the pain gets too

deep. I wish you would do the same for me. We are all responsible for

our own pain, but it helps to be helped by a subtle hand to hold. I can’t

listen to the constant chatter anymore. I here  alot of the same with just

a slightly different message. It is all we have left. Jump on and jump off

that is our choice. Your eyes were flashing the other day. I though they

were so handsome. You make me happy when you are happy. I hate to see

you hurt. I know though the fight and the pain makes you feel strong, makes

you shake back to reality so you can go on in the mundane routine. It is all

okay, I see no point in being a threat. My ego is a passing cloud that will win

in death so I take comfort in the surroundings of life as it unfolds.

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